Cheezin'

Maybe you were wondering what you should get me for Christmas.  Maybe you’re realizing that, while the holiday has passed, you haven’t missed your chance to ply me with a token of your regard.  Maybe you’re realizing that I’m the kind of girl that will receive a belated holiday gift with no recriminations or nay saying, no judgment or ill will!! You probably just thought to yourself “Marie is the kind of class act that wouldn’t even in the darkest corner of her mind think “that lazy so and so is JUST getting around to giving me a gift? I know someone who’s getting an anonymously delivered box of coal next holiday season. Late.”” So now you’re racking your brain and scouring the clearance aisles at Target looking for the perfect memento.  One piece of advice: leave the mug o’ beer shaped cheeses on the shelves, slackers.  I already got me one of those.

 Said cheese was the gift I received at the family gift exchange on Christmas Eve.  It was accompanied by a Packer’s bottle coozie and stocking cap.  The only gift that was traded more frequently was the bottle of Bombay gin my brother provided.  

Cheers!

Love,

M

Throw Me a Fricking (Holiday) Bone!

I have no children, and I refuse to send out cat-themed Christmas cards, so on Monday I shamed my brother and sister into participating in a Christmas picture.  The plan was to send out a Christmas card with a zany picture of the three of us cavorting merrily in Madison. ZANY AND CAVORTING, I SAY.  Ben gamely wedged a Santa hat on his head ... but he understandably drew the line at dangling a candy cane from his mouth.  

What follows are the disastrous  results of our photo shoot ...

Take 1: We probably should have stopped here, but I wanted Ben's Santa hat to be more visible.  Because I got Ben to wear a Santa hat.

Take 5: We switch locations, but this picture's out because Ben looks like he's going to kill someone.  Katie is still being a good sport ... my smile has begun to seem a bit forced.

Take 11.  I decide a change of angle is necessary- we need more ZANY.  This one might have been usable, but SOMEONE (Katie) over-zoomed.  

Take 15.  Ben refuses to feign good cheer any longer.  Things start to go downhill quickly after this.

Take 16.  Ben is thinking of how he could make my death look like an accident.  Katie's eyes have begun to glaze over.  I continue to beam inanely.

Take 17.  Ben expresses his displeasure while Katie fakes her own death.  I smile grimly while trying to make my throttle hold on Katie seem playful.

Take 20: Last picture.  Katie tackles Ben and myself, and the photo shoot ends in disarray.

Needless to say, we ended up going in a different direction with the cards.  Happy Holidays!

Love

M

B

K